its' a great thing to know that 

torment and effort

poverty and rejections that are my 

act of giving beauty to the world and expecting nothig in return

has left me gifted and never recieved

and extremely selfish 

​

make sure to run off with the entire inheritance

it was a real good idea to push me 

​

you can kill my wife and push me out of the way

and insist that someone who isn't materialistic is dying for money 

more than anyone else

​

my wife is dying for your money

I'm going down with her

​

too bad I took it all away from you

Robert Johnson 

​

the most ordinary man ever

i am as ugly as a i am 

because of everyone 

​

I am Bran 

​

a sexual fantasy who never gets any but the satisfaction of knowing

that people will treat me like shit when my wife has cancer 

because they have thought of romps with me instead of her 

i have lost interest in

i have 

 go fucking myself 

so repeating the suggestion when someone is around 

that you don't want my face to be around around

 

isn't if fun, to know that all the people holding me at a distance

were keeping me away from how they were talking about me

around a guy who believes i bask in all of this stuff I ain't there for

​

I just want attention since I have actually never experienced gettting attention

from anyone much,

moslty my wife who is going through chemotherapy after four years of me 

just wanting attention for my art 

​

crying because I want attention for my art

as she is screaming my name because it hurts so bad

boy, i wish i could just get some attention for my art

​

not money, fuck that!

i want attention, keep telling me that 

​

​

until I met her, I was considering that I was actually dead

and nobody could talk to me except for 

lonely psychic people.....

​

oh, I'm not dead.....but no wonder I felt like that 

I was him....but not a re-run

anew tale to grow 

​

i would only do anything for the attention

such as stay beside her and suffer with her 

though paradoxically no acknowledgment of this

has made it reality for me 

​

no one was there for me, 

because I'm strong enough to be here 

that means I don't ever need a hug or for anyone to respect me

because I didn't abandon my post and need 

someone to be there for me

​

a subsititute teacher 

​

i arouse sexual feelings and 

i arouse excitement 

​

for you, all for you 

 

there is nothing 

i get nothing means you might prefer to see

my need for a teacher 

i get nothing but the satisfaction of knowing

​

that I can keep the embers alive and show murderers 

nice try

​

attention

yet somehow it is for the attention

when did this happen?

 

oh, look! He's about to put a gun in his mouth

for attention! Aha! Tricked you, this never happened

 

nothing I have ever experienced can be said to exist

because no attention 

 

you make me real 

you make me reel

 

you make me feel how you want to feel 

or else

 

at her funeral 

make sure to tell me that you and my art are 

in love and spending time together 

 

love my art 

 

do you hate me? 

"I love your art!!

 

same difference  

I want you to hate my art now 

At 

I thought she was the first person to acknowledge my entire being

without becoming terrified

And who else has been able to overcome the

fear that is necessary to overcome if you want to see me as I am

​

I exist

Ripley's Believe it or Not!

​

She isn’t so afraid of me that she must make of me an image

that loves the attention for images so that I may be ever more invisible

that I shovel dirt on my own live burial

​

a gift of the opportunity to create something out of the circumstances 

and raw materials 

strength that is an accumulation of courage 

that grows greater

​

by doing something everyone else is afraid of 

and a mob, a family, a tribe tells you not to do it, because it scares them

​

good thing I don't allow approval or disapproval of others

to be a guide, for longer than it takes to recognize reflections

​

i would never have created anything if it weren't for defying voices 

who told me how awful I am and how ashamed I make them feel

​

Now I need attention, give me so much attention

​

and a warrior must endure their assumptions

that gifted is akin to some form of laziness

​

those who hate what they do to themselves for others

they work

​

unlike you, 

GIFTED one

​

it is better to give than recieve

and i have heard that you are making money

he is making money

​

the humility that it TAKES

to admit that a person is given money

by another, in exchange for their time and energy

​

is lacking

the federal reserve makes money

others collect money

​

others are trading chunks of themselves

as an exchange and 

 

how much of me is in change?

how much is your net

worth

I am the wild 

​

still on the battlefield 

wilderness of outlaw feelings

​

I feel my way to knowledge 

there is no humility in my face 

"Alexander-face" 

​

so listen to my heart and ignore my face 

I will not hide my face because Miss Interpreter 

has a crush 

​

When I tie my shoes, 

it was with my "big ego"

​

If I looked like Anonymous

I could boast and brag and yet accomplish nothing

and be good ol' Guy....from way back when.  

​

I say nothing and the madlib is filled with 

nouns, verbs, adjectives and adverbs that all come

together on my face 

​

a child's face

​

tell me what to do

I can do all that I am capable

as the result of surviving many attempts at 

murder murder murder you cannot kill Bran

​

How does it feel 

being stuck Raisin' Bran?

​

I am the w

 

 

And our images say that this one and that one cannot be together

​

I am not your inner child

a warrior has survived 

rather than never seen hardship 

so bring some

and make me grow beyond the 

childhood of spontaneity and creation

​

why did you let it die

why did you decide rather than 

this is a man who cannot be stopped 

why do you see a lost animal

​

when I'm lonely I want attention for the images that are 

differrent that images given to me

​

and i no longer will allow images to walk ahead of me 

 

Why did a storm arrive at your door,

as you began to hurt that three year old boy

It can only be just a coincidence right

That the storm began the day that you hurt him

 

And you were afraid of him and the eagles that screamed on the fence

That you could see through the window as you were thinking that you were alone

But you allowed God to be there

God saw you and enjoyed your behavior

So now it is me vs. God

The external God vs. the internal God

You called the invernal God

The infernal God

The god of winter

The king of the north

When all is externally dead and frozen

God is within the Individual

The only place where it is warm and beautiful

terrifying

​

I was a weapon that could be used to be wielded by apparent

Creatures who pounce on me and steal my will when I am small and weak because I have gone behind enemy lines

 

​

As you spent your free time patrolling my personal life

This is after doing everything to separate me from

any opportunities to be influenced by anyone at all who could influence my growth

You were given every opportunity to see if you could stop me from becoming this

 

And I am here, looks like you gave it your best shot

I let you get me like a man

who says hit me as hard as you can

I’ll let you go first, but you better make sure that you kill me and if you didn’t kill me,

severely cripple me

 

Well, I took it

I took it from you

Everything you  had

You  gave me everything you had

 

Thanks, for everything

How does it feel,

Being nothing?

 

I am here, stronger than I was before you gave me

Everything you had

 

Look where your fear has gotten you

The complete expectation of your fears

The exact picture of your fears

 

That I could survive what is at the end of the night

All I could find was a lonesome coward that needed 

all that it throws at those who can see 

​

i just want attention for anything that i throw out

just as long as you never look at me, 

that is the value of artand how lucky I am 

​

to be a man of sorrows that are not allowed to be communicated

they want to see a lucky man

they want to see a god 

and an ego that thinks so highly of himself

​

​

i look like Alexander and inside

i am a pale undead troll with scabs on my face and broken teeth

you have forbidden me to relate to the world as an ugly 

and ordinary person 

​

nobody loves me 

so I am too goo for you

because I look like Alexander 

​

Expecting me to tell you what to do

and conquer something

and I don't, i just chill and 

you go ahead and conquer me in some small way 

for being nice to you

​

you never let me buy you a drink

better to give than recieve

​

you like my art,

i should let you be alone with art 

three's a crowd...it's awkward with the creator around

​

I'm the Holy ghost between the Art and the Father 

 

 

That had an extremely powerful tool of flipping things into their opposite

You trapped me in the most elaborate hall of mirrors

If I looked outside myself only, I would never escape

And you knew that you had to block me from the access to the inside

Hit me with everything you’ve got

 

Now I have connected the farthest away from myself, with the home of myself…

 

Now I am everywhere

 

What are you going to do against what you did with everything you’ve got and now

 

Who is Gott??

The German Goat

If you were me you would just love the attention that you would be getting for being able to create something that people say is a mazing

The maze, the labyrinth, alabyrinth is

A wilderness entered with the blessing of the labia

If the guardians of the door have not granted entry

Fear the wilderness

 

Fear is the wilderness

 

I have been born with more gain

You go get born again

More gain is the inertia of courage

There was far more courage

That I took with me to the next place

 

How I am gifted

They took away every outlet

And made me into their outlet

Plugging into me I closed every opening

And the energy the pulled out could not be controlled

So we lived in a hurricane of my upset

They could not take away my capacity to create

To express

 

When you hurt me the eagles arrived and the ravens

Followed your car and the bikers stared at you a long stare

Somehow the boy is doing this

That boy, the voice says

 

Is the enemy

 

My Colors were Black and Red…

I went out looking for the White Buffalo

I was Black and well read and She was Red with moon white Skin

She was well read and Black with moon white skin

I was Red and that was the deal

 

Now I can connect the other side of the mirror